A Mother's Love
by passionfornight
Summary: Esme thinks about Edward and what has happened from the time they met to when he leaves Bella.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. **

**Authors Note: I am experimenting in writing in different point of views. I've done Edward, Bella, Jasper, and Carlisle. Now it's Esme's turn.**

It was Edward's idea that we leave Forks. After the scare that we had had earlier with Jasper, I knew that it was bound to happen. Even though he loved Bella, I knew that he felt that it would be better for us to leave and give her the chance to lead a normal life. I know that it scared him. Bella had been in a lot of bad situations, but this was worse because it happened in our home, and it was his brother. It brought back the fear that no matter how comfortable Bella was she was always in danger with us. The fact that she did something so normal like get a paper cut and it could cause such pain and suffering only seemed to make Edward more determined in the idea that he and Bella were not meant to be.

When I met Bella, I could tell that she loved Edward. She was a small human, and accident prone, but still she captured all of our hearts. The first thing I thought when Edward said he was going to bring her here was what was he thinking. She came though, and I could tell that she was not nervous to be meeting a family of vampires. She was only nervous to be meeting her boyfriend's family. Afterwards though I saw the way that they interacted with each other and realized that she was what Edward had been missing. When he protected her so fiercely when James hunted her and the pain that he was in when he thought Bella was dead, and then when she was in the hospital only made me sure that they were meant to be together.

All of the time that I had known Edward I thought of him as my son, even though he had been around longer then I had I still did. I cared for him and when he rebelled against our way of eating I understood because I felt that it was something that he had to do; something normal. When he came back there was something different about him, a sense of guilt and self loathing. He expected that we would not accept him because of what he had done, but nothing could overcome a mother's love for her child. He was welcomed back with open arms, and understanding.

Carlisle turned Rosalie in hopes of Edward having a companion as well because we both noticed that he was lonely. It seemed like the perfect match. She was beautiful, and smart, but still Edward only came to love her as a sister and then Emmett came along and Edward became the odd man out again. He tried not to show that he felt odd that there was something bothering him, but I could tell. Mothers can always tell. I began to worry about him. Maybe he was too young when Carlisle changed him and so something wasn't right. I expressed my concerns to Carlisle, but he simply told me that for Edward there was one person out there for him, all he had to do was find her. I was worried that perhaps he had missed her.

Alice and Jasper joined us then and it seemed as though we would get along all right, but even with all of the people Edward was still alone. I tried to get him to talk sometimes, but he merely would shrug his shoulders and ask if I wanted him to play something for me. Forks was the best place for a vampire to live, after all there was almost no sun, and we enjoyed living there. One day though Edward didn't come home. When Carlisle came home in Edward's Volvo I knew something was wrong. He told the family that Edward would be going to Alaska. Alice filled in the details that she had gotten from Edward on the way here and that he wished he could say good bye to me, but that I would talk him out of it, so he left.

The fact that he left because of a girl was beyond me. His self control was second to only Carlisle, so the fact that he had left his home because of a girl was a foreign concept to me. How could this be possible? Edward's presence was obviously gone. There were no quiet conversations between him and Jasper, or arguments with Emmett. The thing that I missed the most though was when I would sit with him while he played on the piano. While he was gone sometimes I would just sit and remember mourning the loss of my oldest son. Emmett and Rosalie would sometimes go off by themselves and even Jasper and Alice would leave for a vacation, but I couldn't remember a time other then when he had tried to change his diet that he had been gone. I missed him and everyone else did too.

He came back though and after saving her from being killed by the car and not talking to her for quiet some time, he finally gave in. Every night he would go and watch her sleep and I wondered whether this obsession was good for him. If he liked her so much why did he not change her so that he could be with her? Over time though Edward made it very clear that he had no intention of changing her. I once confronted him on if he only loved her for her humanity, but that wasn't true. He did love her as a human, and he loved her human traits, but he loved what she was. He described her as an angel and he didn't want to steal her soul away from her and doom her to this existence.

I knew that as much as it hurt for the family to go, and it was something that none of us wanted to do, we still went. We would have had to leave soon anyway though because Carlisle and I looked too young and it was obvious that we hadn't changed in some time. I had come to love Bella as a daughter and was sad to see that we had to leave her. After watching the love that Edward and Bella had for each other though I didn't know if they would be able to handle something like this. Bella wanted to become one of us. She was willing to leave the life that she had behind because of the love that she felt but Edward was convinced that it was a phase; she would want a life with kids and a normal boyfriend. I knew that no matter what though, she was always going to love Edward, and we all tried to talk him out of his decision, but he said that it was what was best for her.

None of us got to tell her goodbye though. After Jasper tried to attack Bella he and Alice left so that he would have a chance to calm down and hunt. Carlisle gave notice and I packed. Rosalie and Emmett stayed and helped us ship our stuff. We would move back to Alaska. Not to long later Edward was the only one left in Forks and he told her that we had already gone, and he was leaving to. I wasn't as worried about Edward as I was about Bella though. I knew what it was like to have something so precious to you be taken away suddenly and by circumstance that were beyond your control, but still you blame yourself. You feel so bad that there is nothing left for you to live for. I hoped that she was strong enough to pull through. Edward might be strong enough to leave her, but I don't think that he would be strong enough to handle her death, and I knew that he would blame himself.

We expected him to come home to us, but he never did. We waited and waited and one day a letter came for us. It said that he was fine and he was going to live by himself for a while. As much as I wanted to accept his decision I couldn't. How could he leave and not say goodbye properly…again. We rarely got in touch with him, and only then it was a short letter saying he was okay. Never where he was, or what he was doing, merely an okay. I hoped that he was handling this well, but I knew that he wouldn't. There was one thing for certain though. Whenever he came back he will be welcomed back with open arms and a mother's love.

**AN2: That was a lot longer then I intended it to be, but still. I liked it because it took on a more serious role then my other fics. It let me try writing in another style and voice. Let me know what you think and if you liked it. Hope that you did and if you have any suggestions as to what I should write feel free to PM me or write it in a review. **

**-passionfornight**


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